“I’ll be happy when I lose weight”
I used to think “I’ll lose weight and then I’ll be happy.”
So I would lose some weight and yet I wasn’t happy, and so I figured I just needed to lose more weight. I kept pushing back the goal posts and it was never enough!
It’s taken me nearly 30 years and I’ve lost count of how many different diets to realise you don’t become happy by losing weight. In fact this way of thinking had me stuck on the diet roller coaster for many years.
When I flipped my thinking around and became happy FIRST, then my weight took care of itself.
I can almost hear many of you thinking “this all sounds great Suzanne, but how do we actually DO that?”
To change the way we think we have to practise doing the opposite of what we have done in the past. We have to stop putting our happiness ‘out into the future’ and focus on the ways we can start to feel happy now.
Just so you know, this is a lifelong practice. Unfortunately it’s not something you can do for a week and have it nailed (damn you glossy magazines promising my the life of my dreams once I’ve dropped a dress size – in 10 days!)
This is something I still practice daily, and there are times I still fall over and have to re-start again. But in saying that, it’s like riding a bike, it gets easier each time!
How to practice feeling happy now
Stop comparing yourself
Whether you are comparing yourself to past versions of yourself (eg I used to be able to do this before I had kids) or comparing yourself to others (eg she works full times, has 4 kids, and still manages to work out), comparison only serves to make you feel worse about yourself.
In the age of social media it can be so easy to compare our lives to someone else’s highlight reel (as most people only share the good stuff online). But so often people only share the good stuff, and not the real stuff.
Instead of comparison, please remember that you are at exactly the right place for where you need to be now. I had someone say to me last week “I’ve only lost 17kg and you’ve lost over 70!” My answer was “What do you mean ‘only 17?’ 17 is amazing!”
Make sure you pat yourself on the back for your achievements!
Please never compare yourself to others, life is not a competition, be proud of all of YOUR achievements and celebrate every success x
Celebrate every success
So often when we start out on a journey we don’t allow ourselves to celebrate until we have reached the end (or maybe this is just me?).
It is so important to break your journey up into many small goals and celebrate every one of them! I like to say I haven’t released 78 kilograms, I’ve released 1 kilogram, 78 times!
But above and beyond that it is SO much more than just the weight. I celebrate new exercise moves I can do now that I couldn’t before, I celebrate choosing a healthier option than I would have previously. I even celebrate going to bed early! Because I know how much better I feel when I have more sleep.
I encourage you to celebrate the steps you take (eg eating, drinking water, exercise, sleeping) and not just the results (weight released on the scales). Because if you keep taking the steps, the results WILL eventuate.
Focus on YOUR strengths
It can be easy to focus on the things we aren’t good at. But when we focus on our weaknesses they become the only thing we see. Instead, I encourage you to focus on your strengths, what are YOU good at?
For me, I am really good at being punctual (despite 2 young kids!), being organised (if you need meal prep and exercise planning and scheduling help, reach out to me, it’s my jam), I am also good at writing what so many of you need to hear at exactly the right moment (or so many of you tell me!).
The point I am trying to make it, look at the things that come naturally to you, the things that people tell you that they appreciate about you, the things that you love doing and do MORE of those things! The things that you don’t like to do, your weaknesses, see how many of those you can delegate or ditch, so you can focus on doing the things that light you up!
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