30 years and 500kg later: Why I gave up on diets
30 years and 500kg later: Why I gave up on diets ::
I was overweight for almost 30 years. To condense my long dieting history down into a single post will be a challenge, but I will try my best.
I grew up in a ‘fat family’ of lifelong dieters. When I was 4, I was being fitted with my flower girl dress for my sister’s wedding. At the fitting, I copied my mum and sister. I sucked my tummy in, thinking that’s what you needed to do.
So of course, when my dress arrived a few weeks later, it was MUCH too tight (unless I could hold my breath for the entire ceremony!).
Mum said we’d all lose weight, so every Sunday night we’d ‘empty the house’ eating up all the junk food in a multi-hour ‘last hurrah’ aka bingefest. Then on Monday, we’d start our diet… only to fall off the wagon within a day or two. So the following Sunday, we’d start over with another bingefest.
In my teens I was SO EXCITED because I finally reached the minimum age limit to join a popular weight loss program.
Can you imagine? A kid so desperate to grow up because she wanted to join a weight loss company?
Even with the program, I steadily gained weight, then lost it, then gained it back and more.
My adult life became an endless cycle of diet, lose weight, binge, gain weight – repeat!
I’ve lost in excess of 500 kilograms in my life. There are two noteworthy weight loss attempts.
In 2006, in my fifth year of medical school I shed 43 kilograms. I was so excited and thought I had found ‘THE’ answer. It was fitness. So I left medical school and studied my cert III and IV in fitness and became a personal trainer. I loved being a PT.
In 2007 I got married, moved to Queensland, and in less than one year I gained ALL of my weight back, with interest. I had a lot of reasons (ahem excuses) but the truth was I was the biggest I had ever been. I felt trapped and alone and was hesitant to travel home to visit my friends and family because of my size. I was humiliated to have gained all the weight back.
I tried many more doomed weight loss attempts until in 2011, I once again embarked on a noteworthy attempt.
From 2011 to 2012 I dropped 60 kilograms. I was within 10 kilograms of my goal weight when I fell pregnant. I gained 40 kilograms back in my first pregnancy, then continued to gain weight, fell pregnant again and ONLY gained 5 kilograms in that pregnancy, not that it’s anything to boast about as I was already 148 kilograms when I fell pregnant.
Once my son was born, I knew I had to do something about my weight, but I couldn’t face another diet! After all, as Albert Einstein once famously said:
‘The definition of insanity is doing the same thing
and expecting a different result’.
Finally I’d had enough. It had taken me nearly 30 years but here I was an adult, with two kids of my own, and I finally realised that the OLD way (binge, diet, force myself to do workouts I hated, waste money on weight loss programs and fad diets but always end up regaining everything I lost) didn’t work.
My breaking point was realising I was too overweight to keep up with my kids.
So I decided to try something else. I worked on my mindset.
And bingo! The weight came off, and stayed off.
Am I afraid of it coming back? No. And not just because I’ve maintained this weight for a more than a year, but because I know I’m not the same person any more.
Now, I’m the person I needed to be. It just took a few mental switches.
If you’re ready to let go of the person you don’t want to be and love the person you are, I’d love to help you.